Monday, December 28, 2009
Mountains & I
I close my eyes and sit back....I feel the chill on my face, I feel the freshness of the greens in the air I breathe, I feel the music of nature around me...Yes, she calls me, calls me all the time.
Himalayas and I have a strange love hate relationship. I can’t remember when exactly did I romance her for the first time, but it seems like ages that I first saw her, yet, every time I see her, it’s like skippin the beat of a first love struck heart! She brings out the best of emotions in me....love, romance, excitement, awe, humility, inspiration. Himalayas are my second home. Sometimes, I feel there is more to our naïve relation than I can see.
More so, I suffer from vertigo and every time I go up to mountains, I am scared, but there is a strange force that makes me overpower this fear. My rendezvous with her brings a strange smile on my face, a smile similar to that of a first date, may be also the source of my courage. Every time I visit her, I am lost in her beauty, her shades of green, brown and white, her majestic height almost kissing the blue sky and her overwhelming presence.
The narrow roads meandering through her vast expanse looks like the folds of her green robe, the glittering due drops like pearls strew over her dress and the golden glow of twilight makes her look even more sensuous.
I grew up seeing her, I dreamt big while traversing her expanse. Every time I visited her, I left behind a part of me…and now when I look back
…….I realize that in some of those roads lie scattered some of my dreams that she gave me, the ambitions that define me……..
………..I realize that the glitter of her morning dew gave the brightness I still live with, the open expanse of my mind that taught me to be happy in life…….
………….I realize that the glow of her twilight is my strength, I realize there is a part of her in me. .......O mighty himalayas.. I thank you for being with me.
Himalayas and I have a strange love hate relationship. I can’t remember when exactly did I romance her for the first time, but it seems like ages that I first saw her, yet, every time I see her, it’s like skippin the beat of a first love struck heart! She brings out the best of emotions in me....love, romance, excitement, awe, humility, inspiration. Himalayas are my second home. Sometimes, I feel there is more to our naïve relation than I can see.
More so, I suffer from vertigo and every time I go up to mountains, I am scared, but there is a strange force that makes me overpower this fear. My rendezvous with her brings a strange smile on my face, a smile similar to that of a first date, may be also the source of my courage. Every time I visit her, I am lost in her beauty, her shades of green, brown and white, her majestic height almost kissing the blue sky and her overwhelming presence.
The narrow roads meandering through her vast expanse looks like the folds of her green robe, the glittering due drops like pearls strew over her dress and the golden glow of twilight makes her look even more sensuous.
I grew up seeing her, I dreamt big while traversing her expanse. Every time I visited her, I left behind a part of me…and now when I look back
…….I realize that in some of those roads lie scattered some of my dreams that she gave me, the ambitions that define me……..
………..I realize that the glitter of her morning dew gave the brightness I still live with, the open expanse of my mind that taught me to be happy in life…….
………….I realize that the glow of her twilight is my strength, I realize there is a part of her in me. .......O mighty himalayas.. I thank you for being with me.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Lahual - Spiti Quad Series: The Prelude!
There is a fine line between adventure and madness…..and I think I crossed it this time.
I suffer from Vertigo and I still overwhelmingly agreed to go for a trip to the Himalaya’s on a bike!
When every turn of the road becomes a matter of life and death, when your own life becomes the subject of someone else’s judgement, when your heart prays and your mind betrays, when your eyes dream nothing apart from the inevitable unforeseen, you know you have crossed the line!
However, the unknown gamble paid off and this experience is etched deep in my heart forever.
Eight days, more than 1500 kilometers, and maximum height of 3600 meters ASL, well this sums up my experience of Lahual – Spiti.
The Prelude …
It all began with a desire to go to Ladakh, a plan I had made several times, right from the first year of my newly adorned employed status to as recent as last year, but could never manage to execute. However, this time I was adamant, adamant to do it at any cost.
After bouncing the idea with a few friends, my rattling formed sense to my photography inspiration, the ever so adventurous Parichay. Slowly this noise took the shape of a plan and it then went through a few rounds of iteration and soon I found Asif and Tariq in the mailing loop. I never realized that there plan will only look like mine but will be very different in action (read more scary) and I did not even care to look at how did they detail the plan. Infact, when I look back, it feels strange to have taken them so lightly in the beginning when they were about to become the part of one of my life’s most adventurous few days.
Being a pro at bike trips, Asif made the Things to Do, the route plan, the list of items to be carried very diligently, though I (am sure even Parichay) did not go through in detail. I must accept the fact that there was a big chance of me chickening out had I seen all those things in detail. For once, I thank my laziness.
The week before I actually got to meet Asif for a shopping spree, though of a very different kinds, we went shopping for a off road tyre for his bike, an electric pump, bungee ropes and some waterproofs for our bikes. Next came the issue of how much to carry, I being a not so light traveler was neck deep in worry as to how will I survive in one jeans or just 2 T – Shirts and one jacket, oblivious of the fact that soon all this will become absolutely insignificant to me. Eventually, I made it, I did end up stuffing all that I needed in my gym bag which was compact by all definitions. This did give me a sense of victory for a few seconds.
.................A handful of wishes; a liason of minds
......and off we were .. away from the daily grind........
........of mountains and rivers, of nature's delight,
.........may we bring back memories that hang back for life...........
Watch this space as the mystery unfolds :-)
I suffer from Vertigo and I still overwhelmingly agreed to go for a trip to the Himalaya’s on a bike!
When every turn of the road becomes a matter of life and death, when your own life becomes the subject of someone else’s judgement, when your heart prays and your mind betrays, when your eyes dream nothing apart from the inevitable unforeseen, you know you have crossed the line!
However, the unknown gamble paid off and this experience is etched deep in my heart forever.
Eight days, more than 1500 kilometers, and maximum height of 3600 meters ASL, well this sums up my experience of Lahual – Spiti.
The Prelude …
It all began with a desire to go to Ladakh, a plan I had made several times, right from the first year of my newly adorned employed status to as recent as last year, but could never manage to execute. However, this time I was adamant, adamant to do it at any cost.
After bouncing the idea with a few friends, my rattling formed sense to my photography inspiration, the ever so adventurous Parichay. Slowly this noise took the shape of a plan and it then went through a few rounds of iteration and soon I found Asif and Tariq in the mailing loop. I never realized that there plan will only look like mine but will be very different in action (read more scary) and I did not even care to look at how did they detail the plan. Infact, when I look back, it feels strange to have taken them so lightly in the beginning when they were about to become the part of one of my life’s most adventurous few days.
Being a pro at bike trips, Asif made the Things to Do, the route plan, the list of items to be carried very diligently, though I (am sure even Parichay) did not go through in detail. I must accept the fact that there was a big chance of me chickening out had I seen all those things in detail. For once, I thank my laziness.
The week before I actually got to meet Asif for a shopping spree, though of a very different kinds, we went shopping for a off road tyre for his bike, an electric pump, bungee ropes and some waterproofs for our bikes. Next came the issue of how much to carry, I being a not so light traveler was neck deep in worry as to how will I survive in one jeans or just 2 T – Shirts and one jacket, oblivious of the fact that soon all this will become absolutely insignificant to me. Eventually, I made it, I did end up stuffing all that I needed in my gym bag which was compact by all definitions. This did give me a sense of victory for a few seconds.
.................A handful of wishes; a liason of minds
......and off we were .. away from the daily grind........
........of mountains and rivers, of nature's delight,
.........may we bring back memories that hang back for life...........
Watch this space as the mystery unfolds :-)
Saturday, August 22, 2009
First Love!
Some experiences are etched in your memory! and even with time their importance never decimates.....today I feel like sharing one such experience from my life.......something that defined for me.... what love is!
..........I could do anything for one glance at her! I could walk miles; go completely out of my way to cross hers...I used to skip a few heartbeats when she caught me looking at her! I used to keep waiting for the whole day to meet her for that one hour... I used to keep dreaming of situations where we would be going around! I would be planning 1000 ways to start the conversation with her and when she came, I could never gather the courage! ........ I realized something was happening to me...There was the girl I was madly in something with...something which I could never figure out....though when i look back, it seems to be love......and that something was the experience that defined love for me! and till date I look back to my first tryst with love with sheer admiration! longing to replicate the same every time I skip a heart beat :-)
My longing to talk to her......listening to her endless banter....just being with her.....feeling the warmth around her....and those sparks when her senses crossed mine! those careless brushes...those smiling lips... still crosses my mind when I go back!
I was in some trance...every thought of her would bring a smile to my face even when I would be standing right in the middle of a crowded market looking at 100 unknown faces (read as people shopping around me).....her face would instantly make me feel at peace even when i was facing the wrath of many tormentors (read as teachers).....the thought of being with her would make me endure anything (read as exams, studies, stupid PT classes) for any time (read as school timing).......the adrenalin rush when we shared the same umbrella on a rainy day!...I was surely in some trance...
When I look back, all that i have is
a set of smiles strewn over a few months in time,
a bunch of giggles lying all over those old places where i grew up,
a palm that was wet due to holding hands on a summer day,
a heart with the silly scare of being watched and followed,
a glance of a mischievous smile hanging at the corner of her lips,
a tremble in my lips when I kissed her for the first time,
a feeling of a gentle touch from her embrace,
a thousand rain drops that we felt on our faces when we got wet in the rain together for the first time,
some impatience which grew in while waiting for her,
some needless anger just to steal an opportunity to get pampered,
miles and miles of stretches that we walked side by side
.....and a heartful of memories
After so many years it really doesn’t matter how it ended, all that seems important is that it taught me something....something that the world calls love and I call an itch :-) an itch in the heart!
I think no one can ever forget their first love and I truly believe the first experience in love also defines what and how you perceive love.......here was my perception.....what is yours!
..........I could do anything for one glance at her! I could walk miles; go completely out of my way to cross hers...I used to skip a few heartbeats when she caught me looking at her! I used to keep waiting for the whole day to meet her for that one hour... I used to keep dreaming of situations where we would be going around! I would be planning 1000 ways to start the conversation with her and when she came, I could never gather the courage! ........ I realized something was happening to me...There was the girl I was madly in something with...something which I could never figure out....though when i look back, it seems to be love......and that something was the experience that defined love for me! and till date I look back to my first tryst with love with sheer admiration! longing to replicate the same every time I skip a heart beat :-)
My longing to talk to her......listening to her endless banter....just being with her.....feeling the warmth around her....and those sparks when her senses crossed mine! those careless brushes...those smiling lips... still crosses my mind when I go back!
I was in some trance...every thought of her would bring a smile to my face even when I would be standing right in the middle of a crowded market looking at 100 unknown faces (read as people shopping around me).....her face would instantly make me feel at peace even when i was facing the wrath of many tormentors (read as teachers).....the thought of being with her would make me endure anything (read as exams, studies, stupid PT classes) for any time (read as school timing).......the adrenalin rush when we shared the same umbrella on a rainy day!...I was surely in some trance...
When I look back, all that i have is
a set of smiles strewn over a few months in time,
a bunch of giggles lying all over those old places where i grew up,
a palm that was wet due to holding hands on a summer day,
a heart with the silly scare of being watched and followed,
a glance of a mischievous smile hanging at the corner of her lips,
a tremble in my lips when I kissed her for the first time,
a feeling of a gentle touch from her embrace,
a thousand rain drops that we felt on our faces when we got wet in the rain together for the first time,
some impatience which grew in while waiting for her,
some needless anger just to steal an opportunity to get pampered,
miles and miles of stretches that we walked side by side
.....and a heartful of memories
After so many years it really doesn’t matter how it ended, all that seems important is that it taught me something....something that the world calls love and I call an itch :-) an itch in the heart!
I think no one can ever forget their first love and I truly believe the first experience in love also defines what and how you perceive love.......here was my perception.....what is yours!
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Living my city.......
It has been almost 3 years that I have been working, and ever since, I have dreamt of settling down in Mumbai, A dream that I have nurtured from childhood, for reasons not quite clear to me. However, every time there was a chance to take that road, luck has been not so lucky for me and Bombay has been eluding me, though, I do find ways and means of going there as often as I can.
I was 25 when I started working and I knew I had time to take the hard decisions in life like where to settle, when to settle and so on and hence they were kept on the back burner. I was busy enjoying life in my own way, and as time passed by I kept procrastinating, and soon I realized I had run out of time. Now, as I stand in the 28th year of my life, these decisions are staring at me from very close distance.
For reasons that would never allow me to go to Bombay, I took a transfer to Delhi about a year and a half back. Ever since I have been trying to convince myself that may be Delhi is where I should settle but till date I have not found any reason to do so and today when I ask myself why at all Delhi or Mumbai, why not some other place, I have no answer. This leads me to the next obvious thing, what are the parameters that I should use to decide on a place to settle down? Interestingly I realized I do not have an answer to that as well. Then was my dream of settling in Bombay just a castle in the air without any basis? Is my dislike for Delhi also a baggage from my past or is there a substance to my feeling?
The more I think of these the more I am confused and put off my thinking for some more time. However, I think I have run out of time and I have to take a decision and live it until I can change it.
So, let me figure out what are my parameters to evaluate a place for settling down? I would start by figuring out what interests me. Topping that list is my social life and circle of friends. Well a Bombay, Bangalore, or even a Chennai would surely score higher than Delhi on that count. This is one big problem I am not able to cope with in Delhi. I am just not able to develop a circle that acts and thinks like me. When I say act and think like me, I mean a bunch of esoteric and fiercely independent people who love to enjoy life and its every moment, who would hit the pub at the drop of a hat or twist and turn their bodies every weekend, a bunch of people who love traveling, who love discussing everything under the sun, who love dreaming and exploring. But did I ever had a group like this? I think I did. My circles in Chennai, Bangalore, my escapades with my IIT mates be it in the pubs and discs in Chennai, Bangalore and Bombay or the numerous trips to Pondicherry, Mahabalipuram, Munnar, Kerala, Cauvery, Goa, Pune, Jaipur etc .. etc ..etc, or “My” place in Chennai…they all have spoilt me.
If I look back, the past one and half year in Delhi has not been any less eventful, but the kind of effort that I had to put in to convince people to get on with these things is mind-boggling. This is where I miss a cohesive group that is always on the move, intra or inter city.
Another thought that comes to my mind is have I not tried enough? Well, I do not really know the answer, may be I have, may be I have not, may be I have become more rigid and hence the comfort factor with new people does not develop as fast as it used to in the past. However, I would still say, I have not met a bunch of people like that. However, lately, my office group seems to be a promising one.
Well, I think this is the single largest factor influencing my decision and the day I am able to spot a circle in Delhi, I will own it up. Infact, this city has grown on me, I have started believing that even Delhi has a pulse and soon I plan to explore and find that pulse myself. The elites and literati of south Delhi, the middle class of west Delhi and the sarkari babus of central Delhi, all create a mysterious blend of culture, attitude and values. One really has a lot to take from this city and slowly I have realized that this is where I grew up, this is where I learnt my lessons of life, this is where my memories of strewn all over, may be this where I should live.
And Bombay? Well, will Bombay runaway? Can I not fly there when I want to, Can I not live Bombay as a NRM (a Non Resident Mumbaite)? Well it sounds like a horrible compromise, but then did I not hear somewhere that life is all about the compromises that we make? J I think I need to decide on this and live it for sometime and try exploring all that I want from a city.
Let me live my city and then complain, Let me give Delhi a fair chance.
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